


The Linkshell

by Ein_The_Corgi



Category: Final Fantasy XIV
Genre: Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Amaurot (Final Fantasy XIV), Amaurotine Warrior of Light (Final Fantasy XIV), Chatlogs, Chatting & Messaging, Crack, Group chat, Humor, Inappropriate Humor, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-19
Updated: 2020-01-06
Packaged: 2021-02-26 04:15:42
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 988
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21857443
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ein_The_Corgi/pseuds/Ein_The_Corgi
Summary: Lahabrea creates a tablet-based text chat for the house. It goes exactly how one might expect.Amaurotine Housemates/Group chat AU fic :).
Relationships: 14th Member of the Convocation of Fourteen/Solus zos Galvus | Emet-Selch, Solus zos Galvus | Emet-Selch/Warrior of Light
Comments: 10
Kudos: 48





	1. Chapter 1

[Lahabrea added Nabriales, Igeyorhm, Emet-Selch, Persephone, and Elidibus to the linkshell]

**Lahabrea** : So, since we will all be living together, I thought it might be useful to create a linkshell for the house.

**Emet-Selch** : boring

**Lahabrea** : What?

[Emet-Selch has changed their name to Queen of Sass]

[Queen of Sass has changed the chat name to Ass-cians]

**Queen of Sass** : much better

**Nabriales** : HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

**Lahabrea** : Ugh, really?

**Persephone** : HADES!

**Queen of Sass** : What? Can we not have a little fun? At least let us have nicknames.

**Lahabrea** : Ugh, alright. But that chat name has got to go.

**Queen of Sass** : Fine.

[Lahabrea has changed the chat name to The Words of The House]

**Nabriales** : Wait, we're doing nicknames? Cool.

[Nabriales has changed their name to Coeurl Nabs]

**Coeurl Nabs** : Meow? Meow.

[Coeurl Nabs has changed Igeyorhm's name to Iggy]

**Iggy** : Heh, cute.

**Persephone** : So we're doing nicknames, huh? In that case...

[Persephone has changed their name to Flower Child]

**Queen of Sass** : Looks like the Bus is late again...

[Queen of Sass has changed Elidibus's name to Late Bus]

**Late Bus** : Well ExcUSe mE for not having a damn tablet on me at all times!

**Late Bus** : "Late Bus" does give me a small chuckle, though.

**Queen of Sass** : Keep it, it suits you :)

**Coeurl Nabs** : So what's your nickname going to be, Lahabrea?

**Queen of Sass** : i know :)

[Queen of Sass has changed Lahabrea's name to Asscian]

**Couerl Nabs** : perfect

**Iggy** : oh this is gonna be good

**Flower Child** : HADES I SWEAR-

**Queen of Sass** : :)

**Late Bus** : Where did we put the popping millioncorn again?

**Asscian** : No. Just no.

[Asscian has changed their name to Lahabrea]

[Queen of Sass has changed Lahabrea's name to Asscian]

**Queen of Sass** : yes

[Asscian has changed their name to Lahabrea]

[Queen of Sass has changed Lahabrea's name to Asscian]

**Queen of Sass** : fight me

[Asscian has changed their name to Lahabrea]

[Queen of Sass has changed Lahabrea's name to Asscian]

[Asscian has changed their name to Lahabrea]

[Queen of Sass has changed Lahabrea's name to Asscian]

[Asscian has changed their name to Lahabrea]

[Queen of Sass has changed Lahabrea's name to Asscian]

**Late Bus** : Children, please.

[Asscian has changed their name to Lahabrea]

[Queen of Sass has changed Lahabrea's name to Asscian]

[Asscian has changed their name to Lahabrea]

[Queen of Sass has changed Lahabrea's name to Asscian]

**Asscian** : Fine, you win.

**Asscian** : I regret this decision.

[Asscian has changed the chat name to Mistakes Were Made]


	2. Mistakes Were Made

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> No Moogles were harmed in the making of this chapter :)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Queen of Sass - Emet-Selch  
> Asscian - Lahabrea  
> Couerl Nabs - Nabriales  
> Flower Child - Persephone  
> Iggy - Igeyorhm  
> Late Bus - Elidibus

**Asscian** : WE GET IT EMET-SELCH YOU AND PERSEPHONE ARE A PACKAGE DEAL NOW CAN YOU PLEASE GET A ROOM IM WORKING

 **Queen of Sass** : ok :D

 **Couerl Nabs** : that's kind of hot

 **Iggy** : NABRIALES

 **Flower Child** : GET HIM IGEYORHM

 **Couerl Nabs** : fuck

 **Couerl Nabs** : ELIDIBUS HELP

 **Couerl Nabs** : SHE'S CHASING ME WITH A SPRAY BOTTLE

 **Late Bus** : You reap what you sow :)

 **Couerl Nabs** : DAMN YOU ALL

 **Asscian** : Besides, shouldn't you be working too, Mr. I-have-a-presentation-tomorrow?

 **Couerl Naps** : Igeyorhm and I are literally at the labs right now shut up

 **Late Bus** : Yeah, but I SEE you two destroying the break room playing games with that Moogle.

 **Iggy** : IT'S THE BREAK ROOM

 **Iggy** : WE'RE TAKING A BREAK

 **Late Bus** : For a whole hour?

 **Coeurl Nabs** : MOOGLES ARE CUTE SOD OFF >:(

 **Iggy** : Besides, he's our assistant!

 **Late Bus** : Whatever you say, slackers.

 **Cat Nabs** : Seriously, the one time I endeavor to take a break...

 **Late Bus** : Well, don't blame me if your Concept literally blows up in your face.

 **Queen of Sass** : Well, at least it wouldn't be like that one time Lahabrea somehow managed to get a restless soul stuck inside one of those birds of his. THAT was fun to fix :).

 **Asscian** : OH NO WE ARE NOT GOING THERE

 **Queen of Sass** : Oh yes we are :). How blind do you have to be?

 **Asscian** : FOR THE LAST FUCKING TIME EMET-SELCH, IT POPPED UP AT THE LAST SECOND.

 **Asscian** : LITERALLY NO-ONE SAW IT COMING.

 **Asscian** : ... I'm never gonna live that one down, am I?

 **Queen of Sass** : Nope :)

 **Cat Nabs** : nope

 **Flower Child** : Nope!

 **Iggy** : Nope.

 **Late Bus** : Maybe.

 **Late Bus** : On second thought... probably not.

 **Asscian** : Ugh. You bastards.


	3. Lahabrea is a Fat Nasty Trash Goblin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lahabrea needs to clean his room. And quit smoking.
> 
> Asscian- Lahabrea  
> Coeurl Nabs- Nabriales  
> Flower Child- Persephone  
> Late Bus- Elidibus  
> Iggy- Igeyorhm

**Mistakes Were Made**

**Queen of Sass** : Seven Hells, Lahabrea, can you please smoke OUTSIDE for once?

 **Queen of Sass** : Your room

 **Queen of Sass** : Smells like

 **Queen of Sass** : An ASHTRAY

 **Asscian** : And yours smells like bad cologne. Hells are you doing in MY room, anyways? Get out.

 **Queen of Sass** : CLEANING IT YOU FAT NASTY TRASH GOBLIN

 **Queen of Sass** : Because APPARENTLY you still need someone to parent you.

 **Couerl Nabs** : "ap-parent-ly", nice

 **Late Bus** : very funny

 **Iggy** : heh

 **Flower Child** : :)

 **Queen of Sass** : groan

 **Asscian** : I SAID GET OUT

 **Queen of Sass** : no

 **Queen of Sass** : not until you ask nicely and promise to keep the moldy "science experiments" in the lab you nasty

 **Queen of Sass** : I mean, are you TRYING to get us eaten by a Primal-sized angry Funguar?

 **Asscian** : Maybe.

 **Flower Child** : Well, if you must insist upon not throwing out your leftovers, just give them to me. They will clearly make a fine compost :).

 **Flower Child** : Just... put them in a bag first, okay?

 **Iggy** : I'm pretty sure about half the things in that room would make a fine compost at this point, Persephone.

 **Flower Child** : True.

 **Queen of Sass** : Hells, this room is a nightmare even without the health hazards! No wonder you can never seem to find your papers.

 **Late Bus** : How can one be a qualified member of the Council governing our city when he can't even keep his own room in check?

 **Asscian** : I WOULD if I actually had time, you know.

 **Coeurl Nabs** : Maybe you would have time if you would, you know, actually let us help you once in a while?

 **Asscian** : You idiots would only mess everything up!

 **Queen of Sass** : As if they weren't already?

 **Asscian** : Damn you.

 **Queen of Sass** : :)


End file.
